Is he dead?
Last night I watched a film about Cowboys who do it in a tent – I then went to a bar near my house (Bar 54 Mile End) to meet a man called Jesse… I was totally sober which was an odd feeling going to a bar at midnight…
The huge bouncer said he had to search me… as he patted me down / fondled me I said: “be careful as I have just watched Brokeback Mountain and I am feeling a little confused…” He didn’t find it very funny, got all gruff and assured me and my friend that he wasn’t one of those types…
After Jesse pointed out that it was a rather brave / silly thing to say to a man the size of a truck we got to the door and descovered that it was £10 to get in – you must be joking! So I decided fuck that I wasn’t going in – we stood outside in the smoking area for a bit of a chat…
We watched a drunk fella come out to have a cigarette – but he tripped down the steps and fell into the bouncer… the bouncer picked him up and threw him on the pavement and was looming over him shouting… a friend of the drunk ran over and pushed the bouncer away from the drunk… (oh dear) the bouncer hit this guy so hard his feet came off the ground… (it was quite impressive!)
Another bouncer (a lady) came running out the bar and tried to hold the huge bouncer back – he was proper mad! As has been seen I have been known to be a little foolish at times and tonight was no exception – ignoring the rule that says you never get involved in another man’s fight I ran over to the drunk and his friend and advised them to get out of there quickly – the drunks friend swore a lot – he was also bleeding quite a bit. The drunk was just looking confused. I agreed that the bouncer was indeed in the wrong and yes, he was being rather heavy handed, but none of that would matter if he hit him again! The drunks friend did not heed my warning and was determined to square up the bouncer (despite being half his size)… And as I was between him and the bouncer he also starting to square up to me as well and so I decided that he was an idiot so left them to it… Returning to the smoking area to watch the show…
The bouncer got free from the girl bouncer and punched both the drunks friend and the poor drunk – making both of them go up in the air as he hit them (the big fella knew how to swing a crowd pleasing punch!)… the drunks friend must have been made of Kevlar or something because he got up and again squared up to the bouncer (he was bleeding a lot at this stage)… He got rewarded with yet another punch which actually made him do a back somersault as he hit the ground. The lady bouncer pulled the big bouncer back and took him inside…
The drunks friend was spitting blood and teeth and the poor drunk, who would have been 300% better off had his friend not tried to ‘help’ him, did not get up and was still lay there 10 or 15 mins later when I decided to leave… I wouldn’t be surprised (but rather saddened) if I found out that he was dead!
I think it would have been better for everyone concerned if the bouncer and the drunks friend had just admitted that they were gay and fucked each other… in a tent…
